Things that Go BUMP in the night!

I am asleep.  Suddenly, I'm wide eyed in the dark.  Outside of the tent there is one helluva racket.  Screaming, growling, yelping noises from lower down in the field.  Not that far away.  

They would not abate; if anything becoming more intense as the minutes passed.  Sounded at first like a cat being tortured, then turned into a small snarling yelping dog.  As the seconds ticked by it became louder and faster.  Someones pet is being attacked!  I look at my clock.  It is 02:30.  Get out of the tent Wayne and make it stop!

But oh no.  The cries and the wails were becoming frantic.  There's a monster out there doing its worst to some poor creature.  To hear an animal screaming for its life is proper scary.  

I'm in my sleeping bag.  My heart is beating fast.  A fight or flight reaction I guess.  Anyway it went on and on and on.  Five if not ten minutes of HELL!  Slowly the screaming abated.  Whatever had been attacked was clearly still alive and fighting, just being carried away to some distant lair.  The screams tapered away leaving me pin sharp awake listening to the sound of the wind in the trees. I did not know that rabbits would scream.  Yes they do!!

I could not sleep.  I'm laid there heart pumping hard feeling tingly all over.

I must have fallen asleep at least an hour later.  I was awake again at the same time as the birds at the first break of light.  I get out of my tent, put the stove on and make myself a cuppa as I watch the dawns early light start to build in the east over the distant sea.  It's going to be a beautiful day.  

The pitch next to me had 2 motor bikers on it.  Alan and John from Glasgow.  For sure I needed a translator for John.  His Glaswegian accent was that strong I don't think he was really using 'English'.  Not even the bad stuff.  Alan was much better.  A man who used to do maintenance on all of the lighthouses around Scotland.  Whilst John had shot himself on the Tenants the evening before, so was in a coma for the night, Alan like me had been woken by the melee outside of our tents.

He had a son who lived in South Africa so he kept a motorbike there for touring in the bush.  We laughed over breakfast as he told of the night out in the bush when he too was suddenly awoken by a nearby lion's 'ROAAARRRRR!'.  And how he spent the rest of the night locked in the campsite toilet!  

That night - just before the rabbit lost its battle - I remember looking up at the stars in the sky.  A beautiful night.  With an occasional satellite crossing the bejewelled sky.  Again there I am contemplating about the size of our universe and perhaps that Janet is now somewhere out there. 

Post the rabbit attack and whilst waiting for sleep to envelop me again I recalled how astronauts told of looking back at the Earth from space and having an epiphany moment.  In seeing the beauty of the earth all blue and white hanging in the blackness of space.

The film Avatar clearly modelled the Earth.  The planet of Pandora was described by the Colonel, who's speech contained a warning to the grunts.  "Out there", he says "beyond that fence every living thing that crawls, flies, or squats in the mud wants to kill you and eat your eyes for jujubees".  

Yeah, that's the Earth.  Every single day a billion times over.  Perhaps I had an epiphany moment like that too with the rabbit attack.  Thinking in all of its beauty what such a wild place our planet is.  Dog eat rabbit.  It's called wildlife for a reason you know.  

What with my eye problems and the run up to Janets funeral I'd been stuck at home desperate to get back out on the bike.  Janet's funeral was on the Thursday.  I prepped my bike and gear Friday morning and set off for the coast.  Aiming for the camp site out of the town to the north of Scarborough.  Fought my way through squally windy rain around Malton but still completing the 55 miles or so on a heavy bike through the Yorkshire Wolds arriving some 5 hours later.   For sure I knew that I'd not been on the bike for a couple of weeks.  My knees and wrists were sore and I sported a huge hunger for something to eat.  

In that respect I was no different to the fox that ambushed and attacked the rabbit.  Who knew that rabbits would scream if under significant duress?  It must have been a bloody big rabbit though fighting for its life going by the sound of it.  As I wander the field later that morning there's rabbits everywhere.  No doubt huddled in their burrows as their relative was fighting for its life.  The event was obviously now forgotten as they got on with eating their breakfast.  As did the fox. 

Yeah, well that’s life innit.  I reflect back on what was a difficult day the day before.  To stand in front of a full church congregation and say what I wanted to say (see the previous blog).  Difficult towards the end holding back the tears.  It went down well.  Got a nice round of applause off of the congregation with some saying that it was one of the best funerals that they’ve been to in recent times.  We're thinking of selling tickets for the next one :-)

There was 2 more 'almost' deaths on the day of the rabbit.  

I'm en-route on the outskirts of Bridlington.  Working my way towards the sea front I'm routed down a narrow road - Church Lane - with a small footpath to my right and high walls on either side.  At the end was a T junction with the lounge of the Ship Inn looking back down the lane.  Suddenly I'm wide eyed again as I hear the loud squeal of rubber as this electric vehicle took off like hungry fox, mounted the pavement narrowly missing a couple, squeezed past between me and the wall and came to a screeching halt about 3 meters away from an old couple, one in a wheelchair, who were about to be T boned into the front lounge of the pub!  

I pull up at the side of the new powerful electric SUV, pull open the passenger door and looked into the ashen face and eyes of the old lady who profusely apologised with a 'I am so sorry, my husband got his foot stuck under the pedal!'  He was probably going for the brake, hit the accelerator and got his foot stuck under the brake pedal.  His rabbit like screams only drowned out by those of his wife!  I honestly believe that when he got home, he locked the car, chopped the EV battery cables and threw the keys into the sea.  

Like the rabbit, so we go by the grace of God.  

The headwind whilst running south along the coast was tough.  The forecast was wind and rain for the evening.  That, plus the scary night in the field meant I had no desire to be under the canvas sheet again.  I checked on line and ONLY one place had any availability.  An American motel like dump somewhere between Hornsea and Hull.   The food was acceptable and it was clean but the walls were paper thin.

I arrive at about 5pm.  At about 6pm just before tea I hear the moans of the woman coming at me through the walls.  Feck-in hell!  Just couldn't wait, huh.  Well, it was over 60 quid for the night and I suppose he wanted to get his money's worth.  Feck this - I go into the bar and order a beer and a copious amount of food.

I'm back in my room about 9pm.  Quiet at first then he's at it again.  Slamming toilet seats down in between attacks cos for sure this time going by the rabbit like noises he was hurting her.  Their dogs were in the room too and of course they reacted to her sounds and started yapping and howling along with her.  Any moment now I'm going to knock on their door and give him a better fucking than he's giving her just before the dogs carry his worthless carcass off into the woods.  I then laugh to myself, imagining him coming to the door all naked and proud.  To which I take my rather large steel camping spoon out of my pocket and not so delicately smack the tip of his growing end with it.  Then watch him curl up and die before gently closing the door.  

Then it all stopped.  He was happy.  I suspect she was too.  I was angry and feeling somewhat sorry for her.  Some men.  Well it's all about what they can get and to hell with the pain that they inflict on others isn't it.  Not me.  Yet for some reason women are attracted to such animals.  I just cannot fathom it out. 

I’m back home.  Only three days touring on the bike this time.  160 miles or so.  Out to Scarborough, then down via Filey and Bridlington to Hornsea, then back home via Hull and Market Weighton.  Strong sunshine with heavy showers and wind.  I had to go.  Bike weight with camping luggage all up was 33 KGs.  I knew this because I had weighed it in prep for some possible bike touring options in New Zealand in January.  But only if I get my finger out and nothing else on me breaks.  

The week running up to last Thursday was all about funeral prep and sadly another back of the eye problem which is still under investigation by the hospital.  

Because of my retina issues the cycling this summer has been ‘broken’. Legs felt sore when I arrived in Scarborough but the good news was that each day thereafter the legs felt better.  Yesterday for me I was flying along back to York.  Had a gut full of fried breakfast, cheese sandwiches and loads of cake and still my blood sugar was down at 4.4 when I got home [the normal range is 4 - 7].  Good.  I have my diabetes under control.  

Four things to say to close:

1. I'll never go wild camping again.  Ever.  Forget that.  I will camp if it is the only thing I can do else it will be BnB all the way in future.

2.  My high vis and crash helmet would not have saved my life IF that car had hit me.  But I understand the risk and will not live this life wrapped up in cotton wool!

3. I have never understood women.  I still don't.

4. I'll never watch a Bugs Bunny cartoon ever again!

Ciao for now