Dead Man Walking

She's beaten me to it.  Damn.  My thoughts were clear the other day and I knew what this post would be about but FECK me!  How fast?  I can't even get the ink onto the screen and for it to have dried before this happens.  Nonetheless I'm gonna write about it as though it hasn't - quite yet.  I don't want you to say you can't publish this codswallop Wayne after the fact and pretend that you had predicted this.  Yes I can.  And I did.  So I will..

But not only me I guess.  Anyone, absolutely anyone with an inkling of nous saw this coming.  A crystal ball was not needed in this respect.  It was as plain as the nose on the front of our faces wasn't it?

First of all I saw Kami-Kwasi hitting the ocean at high speed all aflame well short of his target.  I'm struck with awe and all agog watching the financial markets ejecting high speed monetary projectiles with all guns blazing and the Bank of England's governor supplying all the ammunition - 60 BILLION pounds of it!  Kapow!  It's as though we're watching the final moments of the Second World War in the Pacific.  Of the huge cost to the Americans as they fought the Japanese on their final push towards Japan.  Nonetheless, there was still less lost in that little kerfuffle when compared to the current dystopian days of shrinking global economies and wars as best I can see through my cold eyes as the globe warms.  That's not the only oxymoron I'm thinking about today...  

I saw a world in which we were all huddled together, fighting off the Nazi customer service staff at Tescos after glueing ourselves to their ultra expensive petrol pumps, seeking out the warmth caused by the friction of the now hyper expensive / unaffordable hydrocarbon molecules as they jostle Brownian motion style whilst waiting for the end of the War in Ukraine [and of Russia] and for the utopian years hopefully to come.  For sure everyone knew post Kwasi's stellar attempt, steered by the ultra right wing members of the party to destroy the UK's economy, that there was gonna be one hell of a bang!  Kaboom!  He's gone.  Liz 'Betelgeuse’ Truss was due to go supernova soon too wasn't she?  No where near as luminous as her namesake but for sure like it with limited time left.

But then in my minds eye I watched the Battleship Liz 'Yamato' Truss wobble out of port and start to climb a tsunami built gantry.  Her attempt to re-create the wobbly high rise act as done by her predecessor amazed me.  With his big red nose, Benny Hill salute, large feet (bought from the 'how to trip oneself up' joke shop in Pall Mall), white face paint and tiny umbrella he fell off the political high wire and, as is the case with bags of gas, gently floated to the ground before I expect preparing to climb the greasy pole again?

How she then failed to notice that her gantry was different.  That it led to a small but very VERY high dive platform where she would momentarily stand to attention with arms out wide just before leaping off, performing a triple Salchow back flip with a double twist, and belly flopping into a skip full of shite [that's the House of Commons by the way].  Then taken to a recovery room and linked up to a machine which to all intents was supposed to be a defibrillator - but was then fried by the Conservative Party 1922 Committee chairman - or Old Smokey as he is called - in his private conservatory chambers of political judgement and correction [or the toilet as I call it].  Yep, that's how I imagined it would be and .... well I guess by now you too have seen today's news. 

Both for sure had flashbacks at some point in their last week to the film The Green Mile.  As first poor Del-boy then poor Del-girl asked the party chairman in their bestest Cajun English - az we say 'ax-zenses' n'est-ce pas merci beaucoup - to look after their pet mice, you know - the cabinet -  just before being fried and burned.  Yep the lettuce outlasted her..

Oh God.  If I could I would cover my eyes with my hands but that is just impossible with this keyboard in front of me.  Every moment of the last 45 days - whenever Liz appeared on TV I turned it off.  So embarrassed was I and so cringeworthy was her diatribe that I was forced under my covers to hide from the monsters under her bed and the thought that somehow we, the people of the UK, had allowed another idiot to get into a position of power.  Eeeekkk!  Said my pet wallet moth...

Oh dear what a state we are in as a country.  Which to be fair is still better than some.  But nowhere as good as others.  But what did we expect?  

What I expect is some semblance of normality.  Of competence.  Of being assured that personally, financially, medically, mentally etcetera.. THAT I AM SAFE.  In the hands of a competent person at the top.  Someone who understands the machinations of a capitalist global economy and lives of the British people and the problems that we all face.  We expect to feel secure and safe because of, not in spite of, the people that we elect and the institutions that have been built over the eons of time that MUST guarantee our expectations and not fear that the whole shooting match is about to go TITS UP!

I still do not have the 'none of the above' option on any ballot paper so have no way or registering my disgust at the candidates offered.  On many occasions I'm not even asked!  Nope, like the Scots the ability to express an opinion on important matters is time bound.  Generational for them, every 4-5 years for the rest of us.  

But I'm kinda cool with that.  There has to be rules and agreements to avoid a proper melee.  Irrespective of what I have written before about my huge angst over the idiots and clowns that successfully find themselves in a position of power I have to proffer that at least our Parliamentary Democracy, unlike the Autocracies built by some, has the ability to remove idiots from power.  And that British political idiots will play by the rules and will not attempt to undermine the long standing institutions nor exploit the non-political idiots out there for personal gain.  

We are protected in this way from ex-president Fart (obvious swap) types, from Poo-Tins and Ping-Pongs not to forget King Kong-un.  All of whom beat on the biggest and scariest of drums that they can muster to try to frighten folk into capitulation.  And I firmly believe that, yes, whilst we live in turbulent and dangerous times right now, like the turning of the Earth, Parliamentary Democracies will eventually sort themselves out.  

Every single one of us ride our personal life bikes - all of which have their cranks attached to our huge planet. The intertia to make change happen is immense. Yes it is. We might all cycle different routes through this life yet if there are enough of us going in the same direction then that is where we will collectively go. Power to the thighs of the World I say!

So we should feel safe whilst the political pot in the UK boils?  Yes.  Turbulent as it may be right now here and around the world.

However, irrefutably, unavoidably in the long run, truly we are not at risk of being taken to a bad place and kept there by an idiot. Any idiot. As hard as the idiots might try...

I have to believe in that.

Ciao for now