The scale of things

Our suggestion for the holiday rating scales that should be available on all Scottish holiday booking web sites..

Staff

  1. Och, delightful!
  2. Have a pleasant demeanour
  3. Friendly
  4. Missing In Action 
  5. You looking at me?
  6. Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn...

Food

  1. Delicious!
  2. Needs salt
  3. Bland 
  4. Needs more salt
  5. Baby puke
  6. Bork!

 Facilities

  1. Has running cold AND hot water
  2. Has super slow WiFi !
  3. Don't bother trying the shower...
  4. Has combo toilet / sink  unit
  5. With complimentary bedbugs
  6. Pay as you go sheep

Comfort

  1. Aaahh..
  2. Eeeh
  3. Aye
  4. Ow!
  5. Ooohh!

Location

  1. Has a police station
  2. Has a Sheriff
  3. It's a 2 sheep town
  4. It's a 1 sheep town
  5. There are no sheep here
  6. It's in the middle of fecking nowhere!

Scenery

  1. Awesome!
  2. Beautiful
  3. Lumpy bumpy
  4. Mountain bikes only
  5. Crampons needed!
  6. Too much protein in the air

Cleanliness / Room smells

  1. Flowery!
  2. Hmmm...
  3. Whiffy
  4. Nutty
  5. Boggin! 
  6. Fer Gods Sake!!

 Value for Money

  1. A Yorkshireman would be glad to stay here
  2. A Scot would be happy to stay here
  3. A South Sider would be happy to stay here 
  4. A Man of Kent would be happy to stay here
  5. Don't stay here
  6. Bitcoins only

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