LEJOG - It's 2019 so its time to finalise the LEJOG thing...
Hello again Ladles and Jelly Spoons. Big read coming up....
Wow! How time has flown. Here I am sat in a dark winter encrusted room thinking about last year's ride and the coming year on my 'five bar gate' (Koga cronk / bike..). Oh boy how I'm looking forward to it.
For sure the LEJOG thing has completely blown the fearful cobwebs from my mind and now all long distance bike rides are fair game. I have found what is possible and that there is life in this fat old dog yet. A chat about age with one of my 70 something neighbours has reminded me that if we do not use it we will lose it. Keep fit young man and God willing there will be many more adventures ahead.
In my last blog I did say that I would do a write up about the LEJOG thing. Kinda my memoirs about the whole shebang and it's impact on me. So here goes.
Overall I only lost 1 inch from my waist; that's about 4kgs in weight. That's nowt really and means that I will continue buying my clothes from tent manufacturers and dare you wear shops. Nonetheless, my thighs grew 1.5 inches each - that's a fair bit of additional muscle mass on each leg in 4 weeks so the fat loss must have been a lot more than 4kgs suggests! Remember how I thought I had grown Popeye muscles? Well I did! My calf measurement stayed the same but the oedema (swelling) problem around my ankles virtually vanished. Blood pressure was as low as 118/75 (excellent) and pulse in the very low 50's (again excellent). This cycling lark 'aint too bad issit? Even better that my blood sugar normalised. As a result the local NHS drug pusher took me off all the tablets needed to make me 'normal'. All in all great news! However, I'm sad to say that today my HBA1C is up a little, my blood pressure has increased a little and I have put weight back on. As Paul Daniels used to say "not a lot!' but it's concerning. I cannot only blame Christmas for it but it's enough to get this particular worrit spurred on to get fit again.
I've not been on the bike anywhere as near as much as I did in summer. I have been active doing the other things that are not work shaped nor flavoured, for example, lots of hard gardening cutting back years of growth due to gross neglect for the last 15 years. However, that is not enough. As autumn moved into winter my weekly milages dropped from >100 to now probably @20 or so. Not good. I feel OK but I'm back on the slippy slope so the exercise regime has to get back on track. It's too cold outside at the moment for my hairy legs so I'm again using my spare bike indoors on the magnetic trainer. This time in the kitchen cos it is easier to mop the sweat off a tiled floor.
The LEJOG thing for sure has given me loads to do in the off season. I very much enjoy buggering around with poo tube so I've used the last 6 months or so to 'tune up' my LEJOG video. The version I released earlier last year was done with a little too much haste and has a multitude of minor but 'significant irritants' in it which annoyed the feck out of me. Many of you have been kind to watch the whole shebang and some on making it to the end have congratulated me on my future career in TV (thanks!).
However, I've spent near 200 hours at the editing desk buggering around with it like an amateur Hancockian artist who continually messes around at the edges of his not quite finished oil painting to 'get it just right'. Reordering a little of it here, adding a bit there, fretting at the timing of transitions, adding and removing 1 frame on each and every wafter thin scene, getting sound levels just right. Etc. All done to approximately 2000 video clips sometimes into the early hours! I'm now feeling rather Creosoteish having repeatedly licked and sucked every morsel of video as though it were a favourite gravy bone until the magnetism wore off. Unsuprisingly, I'm now rather fed up with fannying around (1) with it.
Nonetheless I've loved every minute of producing the video. You're very welcome to watch it with me but to be brutally honest I've done it for myself! To help me remember in days yet to come, God willing, when I am old and wrinkly with wonky eyes and suffering with dementia watching a poo tube rendering of it in slow motion. How I imagine a pretty young nurse sidling up to me and saying '...do you remember it Mr Tyssen?...' as I watch my LEJOG video for the n'th time, and because I have dementia sternly say '... NO! Feck off!...'.
Here it is - the Directors cut. Many of you will say 'its not changed!?!'... but believe me it has.... Obsessive compulsive video editing is the only disorder that I still have.
My closing remarks in the 'One Man and his Blog' entry described my most significant memories of the ride. That is that this country is all fecking hills; musing about my body and how I had to learn to treat it well; and, finally about the wind, which I now love.
But there's more to say...
Planning LEJOG
It was about this time last year (January) when I started to plan the ride. As I support the SUSTRANS charity I decided to see if I could navigate following as many SUSTRANS cycle routes as possible. Madness ensued. SUSTRANS is a good and hopeful charity who attempt plot and mark out cycling and walking friendly rides on anything that will 'just about do' throughout the UK. Some routes are delightful and loaded with cyclists and walkers. Others are figments of a mad route planners mind in that they will take you generally in the right direction but not necessarily in the right order as Mr Morecambe might've said as he grabbed Mr Preview by the crotchets. Please do not try to use them for the whole journey. However, SUSTRANS routes in Scotland are the best to get to the top.
I booked all my accommodation in advance but decided to carry camping gear for 'unplanned eventualities'. Mainly B'n'Bs or their equivalent for up to 50 quid per night. Now it is important to book well in advance for the ends of the LEJOG thing as accommodation, especially north of Inverness, is rare and it's unlikely you will find vacancies if you try to book late.
Everything was loaded into an Excel tracker and a printout carried in my bar bag in case of technology problems. All booking was done several weeks in advance so my end of day destinations were all known. Expensive? Yes, perhaps. 50 quid per night for 20 of them with some cheapo camping thrown in, then food and entertainment (beers) on top. So not far off 100 quid per day. I figured this would be a hard journey so at least I had a bed with breakfast and a hot shower every day. Not all at the same time. The plan was somewhat buggered though when I broke down (my legs, not the bike) in Telford forcing a day off. This buggered up the forward planning which resulted in several hours work 'on line' rebooking stuff which I did whilst sprawled on a bed cos my legs were dead. Many original places no longer had vacancies and the alternatives generally cost a fair bit more. I had to cough up. On one occasion it resulted in a stay in a sh1t hole as it was the only place that cost less than £200 quid within 50 miles. Well, its all part of the experience I guess? Nah, I could have thrown up whilst eating lasagna and chips in a dog hair and sticky beer carpet room and also slept on top of the bed outside of the sheets for fear of sharing the pit with other blood sucking critters. Next time I'll camp as planned.
Preparation.
Don't be daunted by the thought of having to do loads and loads of practice miles in the saddle beforehand. You will never do enough if you have a job and kids and wife and dog etc.... But you do need to do some to make sure that both you and your bike are good for 40-50 miles per day. I worked on a minimum of 2 - 3 rides out per week of about 30-50 miles each time and then rode myself fit on the ride itself. That worked for me. I remember how my legs sang me to sleep most night at the start but by the end not a peep from them. Just felt really good and strong. Make sure that you ride hills too during your prep. Don't only stay on the flat stuff as you will discover that the UK is all bloody uphill anyway.
One thing that stops many people from taking on such a journey is the trepidation that if trouble hits you will be all alone. That's so not true. The world is busting at the seams with good folk contrary to all the knifing and dark alley horror stories on the news. We do not live in Victorian England for God's sake. I've been out on my travels many times on my bike, on the motorbike and in other ways and whenever I got stuck someone was always happy to help. I recall one late evening on my motorbike with a bone dry fuel tank in Perpignan not able to pay for fuel at an unmanned service station cos the French machines did not take UK credit cards. The very next French guy to arrive was only too happy to pay with his card. I pressed Euro bills into his hand. He insisted on giving me change. Entente Cordiale ensued. Fantastic!
The Route.
Whether doing LEJOG or JOGLE its as simple as generally aiming in a North Easterly or South Westerly direction and picking a favourite route based on your destination, the distance or the ascent. Best laid plans and all that do help but do expect to get lost too even with a Crap Nav. If you notice that you are heading the wrong way (I.e. the sun is over your right shoulder not your left late in the afternoon) do stop and replan a misroute rather than just pressing on. Whilst the Crap Nav will eventually get you to your destination you will not have time for long detours nor late arrivals as happened to me into Taunton, Colchester and when I was 'dead on arrival' in Telford. That just leaves you very tired and hungry at the end of a very long day with the prospect of short broken sleep as your legs continue to spin under the duvet with another long day to follow. Sad face. Try to make the journey scenic by coming off the black stuff. For most of them SUSTRANS canal paths and old railway line routes will not fill you with the feeling of greasing along on brand new tarmac, but are relatively flat and are pleasant enough to rumble along and a scenic way to rack up the miles.
Hills.
You'll never avoid hills in this great country of ours but you may be able to reduce them. For example my planned destinations in Devon and Cornwall were all on the coast. At sea level. Duh! You ride up hills in the morning then down them late afternoon to get to your destination and then all the fecking way back up them the next day... Yup, I'm an idiot for deciding not to stay in the hills. Avoid crossing rivers when in the hills. They're all at the bottom of steep sided valleys. Also beware map colour coding where whites, greens and browns just indicate different heights. The white bits do not mean no hills. It means you are probably at the very bottom of a large hill and so likely to have a sharp climb ahead!
Roads.
It's also useful to remember that A roads tend to run along valleys so are less likely to be as steep as the back roads which climb with ropes and shackles up the side of Baby Garrowbys and whose only use historically was to give Farmer Palmer access to his remotest field and provide the most direct route for his daughter to connect with other banjo players to prevent inbreeding. Don't be afraid to use A roads but do assess them for traffic beforehand. They're very busy around the midlands where white van drivers will do their best to leave long paint scrapes along your right pannier / shoulder. Avoid dual carriageways like the plague! I'll never ride on the A442 (Kidderminster area) nor the A66 (Penrith) ever again.
Clothing.
How much should you take? I had a fully loaded bike and a good bit of that was taken up with clothing. In fact too much of it. Even after paring it down with a sharp knife before I set off I still carried too much. Panniers that were fit to burst at the start should've told me. No you're not going for a 3 week beach holiday in Spain so cut all the paraphernalia out. 2 pairs of shorts, 3 t-shirts, some shreddies and socks and one lightweight fleece is gonna be enough. A fully waterproof jacket should be packed but forget waterproof trousers. I tried them but found that they just trapped in the moisture. My legs resembled a boil in the bag chicken dinner at the end of the day. You'll get to understand that being wet with rain is not a lot different to being wet with sweat except rain is a bit more refreshing. Be prepared to wash sweaty clothing every day. I found that shower gel / soap is good enough to wash clothing to get the sweat out which reduced the need to carry detergents / softeners etc... And then dry them overnight. Some places were fantastic in that they offered to wash and tumble dry stuff for me ready for the next day. Brilliant!
You soon find that most things have double uses. In fact I'm gonna bin most of my MAMIL clothing as it just doubles up on the shorts and shirts thing. Spend your evenings wearing clean clothing and riding in it the next day.
Bikes.
Just about any well maintained bike with plenty of gears will do. There are many go low and slow moments and even though there are some rough sections a normal 14 / 21 speed bike, whether a bespoke tourer or hybrid, will handle it. In fact the other year whilst riding in Germany we passed a Swiss gent touring on a big wheel unicycle carrying his stuff in a back pack! You will need a rack with panniers and front ones too if you're planning to camp. Have good lights and keep them on during the day. I have a Catseye rear LED light. A bloody bright flashy one. Best thing ever at catching the eye of drivers and slowing most down. Carry a couple of spare inner tubes, a puncture repair kit, tyre levers and a few basic tools including a good pump. Make sure it all works before you set off. I (well, the bike) was puncture free this time but experience tells me that punctures do happen when you are remote and least expect them. All else, well get yer bike serviced at a good cycle shop and for about 50 quid plus parts you'll be good to go.
Food.
I had set myself a challenge on the LEJOG thing not to lose any weight. As best as I tried to stuff my face with all that was bad and calorific and tasty just to keep Audrey II (my stomach) happy, I lost approx 4kgs in weight over the 3 and a bit riding weeks. Every day I had a very good breakfast of cereals and toast and eggs and beans and the occasional rasher of bacon followed by 3-4 fruit and cereal bars during the ride, always something calorific for lunch, topped by at least a 2 course carbohydrate rich evening meal AND a ham and cheese sandwich at bedtime washed down with an electrolytic bok-bok (which I think really helped me avoid the cramps). However, the weight still came off. I should not have been surprised though and secretly I was hoping for it. Whilst I have the capacity to eat copious amounts of food the fact that I was burning on average 4000 kcal over and above the norm (so likely at least 6000 to 7000 kcal every day) then it is just purely impossible not to lose any weight. Anyone sticking to a more 'normal' diet would lose shedloads, and I mean from a really big shed. My problem now is because I got used to eating volumes of stuff, mostly good stuff but way too much, it has been difficult to take my foot off the throttle. I've been similar to a bear preparing for hibernation. I've now taken my foot off the gas but the result was that 4kgs plus has gone back on. I'm stable again so again its time to get energised and start to bring the weight back down.
Fitness.
Consider the amount of cycling that you normally do. Novice riders can easily do 40 miles per day with a bit of practice. More cycling (like me) will take you comfortably up to 60 per day. I tried to do more miles but my legs ran full pelt into a brick wall in Telford. That night in my delirious state I started to confuse LEJOG with Moby Dick (which is also a good name for a problem you will suffer with after 3 weeks in the saddle). If you are a club rider then you're probably a racing snake so an elite class Black Mamba and a 2 week jaunt or less would be possible.
As I said before it took me a week's riding to find my groove. That's 50 to 60 miles per day on a fully loaded bike with one day off per week (it's a welcome rest day but also an opportunity to put the now snivelling bag of dog slight through the washing machine and to have a shave). That's about right for this particular fat man. If anyone, anyone ever tells you, and they are built like me (6ft and 19.5 stone) and in their mid 50's, that they will do the LEJOG thing in less than 2 weeks tell them Wayne says NO! Everyone will feel sore and tired at the end of it. But the endorphins and levels of satisfaction are off the chart.
Technology.
For all it tried to break me, somehow both me and the GARMIN Crap Nav made it to the end. Together. Unbroken. Reluctant friends. With great profanities I regularly swore at the damn machine especially when it took me on unnecessary monstrous hill climbs and long detours. Occasionally it gave me something good which I would have missed if I had not followed its lead. A hard ride to the top of the wrong hill south of Bristol resulted me in getting a fantastic view of the south coast of Wales across the Severn estuary on a clear sunny day. But it also regularly tried to route me onto dangerous roads such as the busy A9 dual carriageway near Pitlochry! Whilst at times I hated my GARMIN Crap Nav, the squirrelly fecker that it is, for giving me too many 'non cycling friendly' routing options at least I knew that I could give it a destination and it would eventually get me there. So reluctantly I say thank you Crap Nav. Still Mr GARMIN, you need to sort your CYCLING Crap Navs which have a damn lack of cafe's, cycle shops and camp sites in your POI lists and have no knowledge of cycle friendly (e.g. SUSTRANS) routes. Why not?
Wow! How time has flown. Here I am sat in a dark winter encrusted room thinking about last year's ride and the coming year on my 'five bar gate' (Koga cronk / bike..). Oh boy how I'm looking forward to it.
For sure the LEJOG thing has completely blown the fearful cobwebs from my mind and now all long distance bike rides are fair game. I have found what is possible and that there is life in this fat old dog yet. A chat about age with one of my 70 something neighbours has reminded me that if we do not use it we will lose it. Keep fit young man and God willing there will be many more adventures ahead.
In my last blog I did say that I would do a write up about the LEJOG thing. Kinda my memoirs about the whole shebang and it's impact on me. So here goes.
Overall I only lost 1 inch from my waist; that's about 4kgs in weight. That's nowt really and means that I will continue buying my clothes from tent manufacturers and dare you wear shops. Nonetheless, my thighs grew 1.5 inches each - that's a fair bit of additional muscle mass on each leg in 4 weeks so the fat loss must have been a lot more than 4kgs suggests! Remember how I thought I had grown Popeye muscles? Well I did! My calf measurement stayed the same but the oedema (swelling) problem around my ankles virtually vanished. Blood pressure was as low as 118/75 (excellent) and pulse in the very low 50's (again excellent). This cycling lark 'aint too bad issit? Even better that my blood sugar normalised. As a result the local NHS drug pusher took me off all the tablets needed to make me 'normal'. All in all great news! However, I'm sad to say that today my HBA1C is up a little, my blood pressure has increased a little and I have put weight back on. As Paul Daniels used to say "not a lot!' but it's concerning. I cannot only blame Christmas for it but it's enough to get this particular worrit spurred on to get fit again.
I've not been on the bike anywhere as near as much as I did in summer. I have been active doing the other things that are not work shaped nor flavoured, for example, lots of hard gardening cutting back years of growth due to gross neglect for the last 15 years. However, that is not enough. As autumn moved into winter my weekly milages dropped from >100 to now probably @20 or so. Not good. I feel OK but I'm back on the slippy slope so the exercise regime has to get back on track. It's too cold outside at the moment for my hairy legs so I'm again using my spare bike indoors on the magnetic trainer. This time in the kitchen cos it is easier to mop the sweat off a tiled floor.
The LEJOG thing for sure has given me loads to do in the off season. I very much enjoy buggering around with poo tube so I've used the last 6 months or so to 'tune up' my LEJOG video. The version I released earlier last year was done with a little too much haste and has a multitude of minor but 'significant irritants' in it which annoyed the feck out of me. Many of you have been kind to watch the whole shebang and some on making it to the end have congratulated me on my future career in TV (thanks!).
However, I've spent near 200 hours at the editing desk buggering around with it like an amateur Hancockian artist who continually messes around at the edges of his not quite finished oil painting to 'get it just right'. Reordering a little of it here, adding a bit there, fretting at the timing of transitions, adding and removing 1 frame on each and every wafter thin scene, getting sound levels just right. Etc. All done to approximately 2000 video clips sometimes into the early hours! I'm now feeling rather Creosoteish having repeatedly licked and sucked every morsel of video as though it were a favourite gravy bone until the magnetism wore off. Unsuprisingly, I'm now rather fed up with fannying around (1) with it.
Nonetheless I've loved every minute of producing the video. You're very welcome to watch it with me but to be brutally honest I've done it for myself! To help me remember in days yet to come, God willing, when I am old and wrinkly with wonky eyes and suffering with dementia watching a poo tube rendering of it in slow motion. How I imagine a pretty young nurse sidling up to me and saying '...do you remember it Mr Tyssen?...' as I watch my LEJOG video for the n'th time, and because I have dementia sternly say '... NO! Feck off!...'.
Here it is - the Directors cut. Many of you will say 'its not changed!?!'... but believe me it has.... Obsessive compulsive video editing is the only disorder that I still have.
My closing remarks in the 'One Man and his Blog' entry described my most significant memories of the ride. That is that this country is all fecking hills; musing about my body and how I had to learn to treat it well; and, finally about the wind, which I now love.
But there's more to say...
Planning LEJOG
It was about this time last year (January) when I started to plan the ride. As I support the SUSTRANS charity I decided to see if I could navigate following as many SUSTRANS cycle routes as possible. Madness ensued. SUSTRANS is a good and hopeful charity who attempt plot and mark out cycling and walking friendly rides on anything that will 'just about do' throughout the UK. Some routes are delightful and loaded with cyclists and walkers. Others are figments of a mad route planners mind in that they will take you generally in the right direction but not necessarily in the right order as Mr Morecambe might've said as he grabbed Mr Preview by the crotchets. Please do not try to use them for the whole journey. However, SUSTRANS routes in Scotland are the best to get to the top.
I booked all my accommodation in advance but decided to carry camping gear for 'unplanned eventualities'. Mainly B'n'Bs or their equivalent for up to 50 quid per night. Now it is important to book well in advance for the ends of the LEJOG thing as accommodation, especially north of Inverness, is rare and it's unlikely you will find vacancies if you try to book late.
Everything was loaded into an Excel tracker and a printout carried in my bar bag in case of technology problems. All booking was done several weeks in advance so my end of day destinations were all known. Expensive? Yes, perhaps. 50 quid per night for 20 of them with some cheapo camping thrown in, then food and entertainment (beers) on top. So not far off 100 quid per day. I figured this would be a hard journey so at least I had a bed with breakfast and a hot shower every day. Not all at the same time. The plan was somewhat buggered though when I broke down (my legs, not the bike) in Telford forcing a day off. This buggered up the forward planning which resulted in several hours work 'on line' rebooking stuff which I did whilst sprawled on a bed cos my legs were dead. Many original places no longer had vacancies and the alternatives generally cost a fair bit more. I had to cough up. On one occasion it resulted in a stay in a sh1t hole as it was the only place that cost less than £200 quid within 50 miles. Well, its all part of the experience I guess? Nah, I could have thrown up whilst eating lasagna and chips in a dog hair and sticky beer carpet room and also slept on top of the bed outside of the sheets for fear of sharing the pit with other blood sucking critters. Next time I'll camp as planned.
Preparation.
Don't be daunted by the thought of having to do loads and loads of practice miles in the saddle beforehand. You will never do enough if you have a job and kids and wife and dog etc.... But you do need to do some to make sure that both you and your bike are good for 40-50 miles per day. I worked on a minimum of 2 - 3 rides out per week of about 30-50 miles each time and then rode myself fit on the ride itself. That worked for me. I remember how my legs sang me to sleep most night at the start but by the end not a peep from them. Just felt really good and strong. Make sure that you ride hills too during your prep. Don't only stay on the flat stuff as you will discover that the UK is all bloody uphill anyway.
One thing that stops many people from taking on such a journey is the trepidation that if trouble hits you will be all alone. That's so not true. The world is busting at the seams with good folk contrary to all the knifing and dark alley horror stories on the news. We do not live in Victorian England for God's sake. I've been out on my travels many times on my bike, on the motorbike and in other ways and whenever I got stuck someone was always happy to help. I recall one late evening on my motorbike with a bone dry fuel tank in Perpignan not able to pay for fuel at an unmanned service station cos the French machines did not take UK credit cards. The very next French guy to arrive was only too happy to pay with his card. I pressed Euro bills into his hand. He insisted on giving me change. Entente Cordiale ensued. Fantastic!
The Route.
Whether doing LEJOG or JOGLE its as simple as generally aiming in a North Easterly or South Westerly direction and picking a favourite route based on your destination, the distance or the ascent. Best laid plans and all that do help but do expect to get lost too even with a Crap Nav. If you notice that you are heading the wrong way (I.e. the sun is over your right shoulder not your left late in the afternoon) do stop and replan a misroute rather than just pressing on. Whilst the Crap Nav will eventually get you to your destination you will not have time for long detours nor late arrivals as happened to me into Taunton, Colchester and when I was 'dead on arrival' in Telford. That just leaves you very tired and hungry at the end of a very long day with the prospect of short broken sleep as your legs continue to spin under the duvet with another long day to follow. Sad face. Try to make the journey scenic by coming off the black stuff. For most of them SUSTRANS canal paths and old railway line routes will not fill you with the feeling of greasing along on brand new tarmac, but are relatively flat and are pleasant enough to rumble along and a scenic way to rack up the miles.
Hills.
You'll never avoid hills in this great country of ours but you may be able to reduce them. For example my planned destinations in Devon and Cornwall were all on the coast. At sea level. Duh! You ride up hills in the morning then down them late afternoon to get to your destination and then all the fecking way back up them the next day... Yup, I'm an idiot for deciding not to stay in the hills. Avoid crossing rivers when in the hills. They're all at the bottom of steep sided valleys. Also beware map colour coding where whites, greens and browns just indicate different heights. The white bits do not mean no hills. It means you are probably at the very bottom of a large hill and so likely to have a sharp climb ahead!
Roads.
It's also useful to remember that A roads tend to run along valleys so are less likely to be as steep as the back roads which climb with ropes and shackles up the side of Baby Garrowbys and whose only use historically was to give Farmer Palmer access to his remotest field and provide the most direct route for his daughter to connect with other banjo players to prevent inbreeding. Don't be afraid to use A roads but do assess them for traffic beforehand. They're very busy around the midlands where white van drivers will do their best to leave long paint scrapes along your right pannier / shoulder. Avoid dual carriageways like the plague! I'll never ride on the A442 (Kidderminster area) nor the A66 (Penrith) ever again.
Clothing.
How much should you take? I had a fully loaded bike and a good bit of that was taken up with clothing. In fact too much of it. Even after paring it down with a sharp knife before I set off I still carried too much. Panniers that were fit to burst at the start should've told me. No you're not going for a 3 week beach holiday in Spain so cut all the paraphernalia out. 2 pairs of shorts, 3 t-shirts, some shreddies and socks and one lightweight fleece is gonna be enough. A fully waterproof jacket should be packed but forget waterproof trousers. I tried them but found that they just trapped in the moisture. My legs resembled a boil in the bag chicken dinner at the end of the day. You'll get to understand that being wet with rain is not a lot different to being wet with sweat except rain is a bit more refreshing. Be prepared to wash sweaty clothing every day. I found that shower gel / soap is good enough to wash clothing to get the sweat out which reduced the need to carry detergents / softeners etc... And then dry them overnight. Some places were fantastic in that they offered to wash and tumble dry stuff for me ready for the next day. Brilliant!
You soon find that most things have double uses. In fact I'm gonna bin most of my MAMIL clothing as it just doubles up on the shorts and shirts thing. Spend your evenings wearing clean clothing and riding in it the next day.
Bikes.
Just about any well maintained bike with plenty of gears will do. There are many go low and slow moments and even though there are some rough sections a normal 14 / 21 speed bike, whether a bespoke tourer or hybrid, will handle it. In fact the other year whilst riding in Germany we passed a Swiss gent touring on a big wheel unicycle carrying his stuff in a back pack! You will need a rack with panniers and front ones too if you're planning to camp. Have good lights and keep them on during the day. I have a Catseye rear LED light. A bloody bright flashy one. Best thing ever at catching the eye of drivers and slowing most down. Carry a couple of spare inner tubes, a puncture repair kit, tyre levers and a few basic tools including a good pump. Make sure it all works before you set off. I (well, the bike) was puncture free this time but experience tells me that punctures do happen when you are remote and least expect them. All else, well get yer bike serviced at a good cycle shop and for about 50 quid plus parts you'll be good to go.
Food.
I had set myself a challenge on the LEJOG thing not to lose any weight. As best as I tried to stuff my face with all that was bad and calorific and tasty just to keep Audrey II (my stomach) happy, I lost approx 4kgs in weight over the 3 and a bit riding weeks. Every day I had a very good breakfast of cereals and toast and eggs and beans and the occasional rasher of bacon followed by 3-4 fruit and cereal bars during the ride, always something calorific for lunch, topped by at least a 2 course carbohydrate rich evening meal AND a ham and cheese sandwich at bedtime washed down with an electrolytic bok-bok (which I think really helped me avoid the cramps). However, the weight still came off. I should not have been surprised though and secretly I was hoping for it. Whilst I have the capacity to eat copious amounts of food the fact that I was burning on average 4000 kcal over and above the norm (so likely at least 6000 to 7000 kcal every day) then it is just purely impossible not to lose any weight. Anyone sticking to a more 'normal' diet would lose shedloads, and I mean from a really big shed. My problem now is because I got used to eating volumes of stuff, mostly good stuff but way too much, it has been difficult to take my foot off the throttle. I've been similar to a bear preparing for hibernation. I've now taken my foot off the gas but the result was that 4kgs plus has gone back on. I'm stable again so again its time to get energised and start to bring the weight back down.
Fitness.
Consider the amount of cycling that you normally do. Novice riders can easily do 40 miles per day with a bit of practice. More cycling (like me) will take you comfortably up to 60 per day. I tried to do more miles but my legs ran full pelt into a brick wall in Telford. That night in my delirious state I started to confuse LEJOG with Moby Dick (which is also a good name for a problem you will suffer with after 3 weeks in the saddle). If you are a club rider then you're probably a racing snake so an elite class Black Mamba and a 2 week jaunt or less would be possible.
As I said before it took me a week's riding to find my groove. That's 50 to 60 miles per day on a fully loaded bike with one day off per week (it's a welcome rest day but also an opportunity to put the now snivelling bag of dog slight through the washing machine and to have a shave). That's about right for this particular fat man. If anyone, anyone ever tells you, and they are built like me (6ft and 19.5 stone) and in their mid 50's, that they will do the LEJOG thing in less than 2 weeks tell them Wayne says NO! Everyone will feel sore and tired at the end of it. But the endorphins and levels of satisfaction are off the chart.
Technology.
For all it tried to break me, somehow both me and the GARMIN Crap Nav made it to the end. Together. Unbroken. Reluctant friends. With great profanities I regularly swore at the damn machine especially when it took me on unnecessary monstrous hill climbs and long detours. Occasionally it gave me something good which I would have missed if I had not followed its lead. A hard ride to the top of the wrong hill south of Bristol resulted me in getting a fantastic view of the south coast of Wales across the Severn estuary on a clear sunny day. But it also regularly tried to route me onto dangerous roads such as the busy A9 dual carriageway near Pitlochry! Whilst at times I hated my GARMIN Crap Nav, the squirrelly fecker that it is, for giving me too many 'non cycling friendly' routing options at least I knew that I could give it a destination and it would eventually get me there. So reluctantly I say thank you Crap Nav. Still Mr GARMIN, you need to sort your CYCLING Crap Navs which have a damn lack of cafe's, cycle shops and camp sites in your POI lists and have no knowledge of cycle friendly (e.g. SUSTRANS) routes. Why not?
Charity
It's not a must do but it was so worth it to spend a little time and effort begging people to make charitable donations. After all some reward for a charity or two (such as CRUK and the RNLI this time) for a job well done surely was an objective of this? I kept it simple by using Just Giving pages and to avoid any problem when travelling I printed out 30 to 40 paper slips with the url's for this blog and for the Just Giving pages to give to people on route. Which I did. Not only to let people share the journey with me (and as a result some of whom also made donations, yay!) but to also avoid the problem of people giving me cash in hand. Simply I said I could not accept cash, thanked them and handed over a paper slip which worked a treat. Forget carrying collection boxes with you. The law in this country means you would need to write to every council on route to apply for a permit to collect cash donations as you pass through their jurisdiction. Stick with the paper slips - dish them out like confetti. It worked well.
That about sums it up. So many great memories. So many people that helped (Ian and Diane in Preston, Ken in Cumbria, Mark and Gill in Moffat, David and Fiona in Milngavie and of course Kathryn) with their hospitality, kindness and so many of you with your charitable donations, generosity and support. Thank You again.
If you are thinking about doing LEJOG one day then remember this. LEJOG is a one off, expensive and challenging holiday. Yes it's a holiday. Not a race to an end. So take your time and make sure you enjoy it.
More will be writ later as the year unfolds and I do hope that you spend a little time following me on my future travels.
Ciao Baby
It's not a must do but it was so worth it to spend a little time and effort begging people to make charitable donations. After all some reward for a charity or two (such as CRUK and the RNLI this time) for a job well done surely was an objective of this? I kept it simple by using Just Giving pages and to avoid any problem when travelling I printed out 30 to 40 paper slips with the url's for this blog and for the Just Giving pages to give to people on route. Which I did. Not only to let people share the journey with me (and as a result some of whom also made donations, yay!) but to also avoid the problem of people giving me cash in hand. Simply I said I could not accept cash, thanked them and handed over a paper slip which worked a treat. Forget carrying collection boxes with you. The law in this country means you would need to write to every council on route to apply for a permit to collect cash donations as you pass through their jurisdiction. Stick with the paper slips - dish them out like confetti. It worked well.
That about sums it up. So many great memories. So many people that helped (Ian and Diane in Preston, Ken in Cumbria, Mark and Gill in Moffat, David and Fiona in Milngavie and of course Kathryn) with their hospitality, kindness and so many of you with your charitable donations, generosity and support. Thank You again.
If you are thinking about doing LEJOG one day then remember this. LEJOG is a one off, expensive and challenging holiday. Yes it's a holiday. Not a race to an end. So take your time and make sure you enjoy it.
More will be writ later as the year unfolds and I do hope that you spend a little time following me on my future travels.
Ciao Baby
(1) Fannying around - A term initially coined by Leonardo da Vinci because he was fed up of trying to get the Mona Lisa smile 'just right'; and, because he could not, as best as he tried, make a similar masterpiece out of her with body paint. When asked why not he said he had some recollection of an embarrassing problem when applying the paint... but that he was not able to quite put his finger on it...
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